3 Things I have learned in 3 months…

Hello beautiful person reading these words! I hope this week has been kind to you and that you are excited for what is to come, whatever it may be. There is a topic that has been weighing heavy on me but I don’t feel like I have it completely figured out yet and there is a lot of emotion behind it so I want to hold off on discussing it.

Life is a continuous learning experience. Every day we learn more about ourselves, the people around us and the world we live in. I signed up for a masterclass about Bible detox and unlearning toxic beliefs. I think it is amazing that we can have these conversations. I won’t get into it too deep but Dr. Dharius Daniels shared a quote from a rabbi: ” For us Jews, studying the Bible is more important than obeying it, because if you don’t understand it rightly you will obey it wrongly and you obedience will be disobedience”. My takeaway from this quote (in a general sense) is that sometimes we may do things and our intentions are good but due to lack of understanding/ information, we may actually do more harm than good. If we have to make a decision about something, but we are not properly informed about the topic, then we could make a decision that we think is good but in reality isn’t. A gentle reminder for us to understand things properly before making a decision that may have us doing the exact opposite of what our intentions were.

Another thing that I have learnt as I journey on this spiritual walk is learning to trust myself. As humans, we can get caught up second guessing ourselves. Sometimes I wonder if what I heard is truly from God or just my own thoughts. Or I may question if I can truly do something. As a recovering people- pleaser, I sometimes question myself if I am doing the right thing. It is important to stop the self- doubt. In the Bible, it says we must hold our thoughts captive. Question those negative thoughts to uncover the origins. Everything you will ever need at any phase in your life is already within you. As you learn to embrace your worth and value, trusting yourself is a big step. Trust that you know what is right for you. And if you have made mistakes in your past, trust that you can overcome them and start anew. We won’t always get it right but that is also part of the learning process. You are free to change and become a new person. If a behavior or mindset is no longer serving us, then we are free to unlearn it and learn a more productive way to deal with things.

Show up. Show up for yourself by speaking up for yourself and doing what is right for you. That is also how you learn to trust yourself. I used to go to the bakery and if they got my order wrong, I would not say anything. But then I stopped that. If I want a coffee, and the lady is trying to do multiple things at a time and gets my order wrong, I will politely correct her. I understand that she is overworked and trying to multi task but I am not honoring myself by accepting something I do not want. You cannot “hurt” yourself to honor someone else. We are all meant to coexist with one another. Your wants and needs are no less than someone else’s. If we interact with respect and love, we would realize that a lot of people are not as offended as we think they will be when we ask for what we want. Please know that everything in this life has a duality. So it is OK for you to speak up for yourself and it is also OK for the other person to speak up for themselves. There may not always be agreement, but it also does not need to end in conflict. Respecting each other’s wishes goes a long way.

There is always a beginning and an end. There will be phases of your life that you wish would end quickly and others that you wish would never end. The same is true for relationships. But there is also a shift within the same relationship or phase where things are altered, so for example, you can have two people who are in conflict with one another and there can be an end to that conflict and simultaneously a beginning of a friendship. There is no ending that does not have a new beginning. Even in death, the end of our physical life is the beginning of something new. There is always something to look forward to. There is always something just around the riverbend. It is up to us to keep the faith and believe that there is something to look forward to. We can keep looking back at what was or we can embrace what is ahead of us. It is like a cycle, we keep learning and growing and evolving.

I hope this made sense to someone else besides me. If it did, please reach out via direct message on IG or shoot me an email through the contact form on the page. Some days I feel like this blog is my personal diary and then someone sends a message and I am reminded that there are people out there reading this as well. Hopefully next week I will be back to my usual Tuesday and can share more of the topic I had. Have a great week and remember, you got this!

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