Rest & Relaxation

Happy Sunday!

You may or may not have noticed that there was no blog last week. After 13 consecutive weeks, I decided I needed to take a break. I even tried to write something but truth be told, I was not inspired. The past few weeks have been pretty intense as I did some soul searching. The journey of self-love is a never-ending one. I tend to be hard on myself and just like with work, I tend to just keep going. The past week has reminded me to slow down and rest. Before COVID I was begging for a chance to rest and now that I can make my own schedule, I found myself filling it up with little to no time to rest.

Our minds and bodies are truly amazing. The amount of information that is processed daily is unbelievable. We are not machines, although we treat ourselves that way sometimes. And even machines need rest. Even God rested! Society has programmed us to constantly be busy. Slogans like “Sleep when you die” have been engraved in us. In order to process all of the information it receives, our bodies and minds need to rest. If we’re constantly on GO, we are not processing information correctly because our bodies are making sure we go. If you take a road trip and you need to get to point B by a certain time, you are not stopping unnecessarily and not taking in the sights. Someone at Point B might ask if you saw xyz along the way and your response may be that you think you saw a sign but you definitely did not stop there. Sometimes this mindset is needed to reach a goal or complete a project but you can’t keep going and going with no rest.

Usually when we rest, we are also inspired or some things may become clearer. Your body will speak to you and let you know when its time to pause. Listen to it. As you learn to listen to your body and trust yourself, you will learn more about yourself and ultimately what works for you. Would you rather spend years doing things you don’t like that make you uncomfortable just because someone said it should be done or would you prefer a life that meets your needs? We think if we work hard at something, that we will begin to like it or maybe it will get easier but that’s not the case. Sometimes we need to let go to find what we actually want. 

I lost my job in May and I did not think I would be making fruit pops and boozy pouches full-time yet Tropsical is here and here to stay. It may seem trivial but i feel more fulfilled and I have the time to spend with my kids and be involved. I say all of that to say we need to make space for the things we want but so often we hold on so tightly to what is not serving us that we can’t hold on to what we want. Don’t go out and quit your job just yet. Start making space in small ways. You want to start a business? Start setting aside time daily or weekly to work on the business. Do you have a name? Do you know why you want to do it? What sets you apart? You want a home office but have you made space? Do you know what you will need? 

You have to learn to trust yourself. We often talk about our distrust in others but often times, it starts with us distrusting ourselves. Listen to yourself. Know what feels good and does not just sound good. We are all different so different things will excite us. There will be moments when you are learning and moments that require unlearning. For example, I used to love event planning but right now I don’t. Do not be afraid to let some things go. You don’t have to like everything your friends are liking. They don’t have to like everything you like. Take time to learn yourself and honor yourself.

Remember that your rest is important. During your pause, you will do things that make you happy. For me, some days that means I am on the beach and other days I am cuddled up with a good book. Don’t drain yourself and your creativity by doing too much. Be inspired as much as you want to inspire. Have a great week!  

P.S. Be sure to follow @motherlovingdiva and @tropsicalsxm on Instagram!

Speak up … for others, but definitely for yourself!

Happy Saturday!

I tried my best to get this out on Friday but Thursday was a bit of a long day and Friday morning just vanished right in front of my eyes. As you know, a thought usually pops into my head and then is confirmed by seemingly random interactions or images. This week was similar and most of my conversations revolved around this week’s blog.

What I want to touch on this week is kind of two-fold. So first and foremost I want you to embrace where you are on your journey. Which takes me back to last week. If you did not read last week’s post, then stop and read it and come back to this. If you read last week’s blog, you would know I spoke about being grateful and appreciating what you have. I hope you made a list. Your journey may not have gone as you had anticipated or hoped but there are things (lessons, blessings, persons or actual things) you accumulated while on the journey that you would not have experienced if you did not take that specific path. 

Your path is unique to you and shapes who you are. If you do not like the road you are on then look for the next turn or alley and take a different path. It is never too late to change paths. I once read that when you don’t know where you are going, any path can take you there. I don’t think we need to focus on the path so much as ensuring we reach our final destination. We are hard on ourselves when we take a wrong turn and that negativity blocks us from seeing that we are on a new path filled with sunshine and all the things we like. Where you have been does not determine where you will go.Take a look at where you are at now and how far you have come and adjust your path accordingly but don’t focus too much on the negative. 

Secondly, I want to talk about speaking up for yourself. There is a lot happening right now and it may seem easier to speak up for others because it is the right thing to do but it is equally important to speak up for yourself. I was faced with a few situations this week where normally I would shrink myself just to avoid any conflict. Subconsciously I found myself speaking up for myself and lo and behold, there still was no conflict. Poof! That untruth was crushed. I could speak up for myself, get the issue resolved and the world did not end. In all of the situations I was respectful but stern.

You set the standard for your interactions. If you are constantly letting things slide, you are giving the impression that subpar service or work is acceptable. So here is my example without any names. I purchased a service from a local service provider and despite my efforts, communication was lacking and the service was terminated unbeknownst to me. When I found out, I normally would have left it and grumbled at the money I lost. This time I respectfully but firmly laid out my side of the story and mentioned that I found their response unacceptable. Lo and behold, I received a call explaining what went wrong and the representative took responsibility for her part and assured me she would find a solution. 

Speaking up for yourself gives you the confidence to trust yourself, and get what you deserve.There is no more internal war or the feeling that you got the short end of the stick. There may not always be a solution but the fact that you spoke up gives you peace of mind that you did everything possible to rectify the situation. Speaking up for yourself is also really important when it comes to setting and maintaining boundaries which I will touch on in another blog post. If someone is constantly doing or saying something you do not like, then speak up and let them know you do not appreciate it. It could make all of the difference.

The challenge this week is pretty easy. Pay attention to opportunities to speak up for yourself and also opportunities to embrace where you are one your journey. Sometimes a wrong turn can lead us to a shortcut or the scenic route to our destination. Speaking up builds our confidence, increases our self love and can sometimes allow us to get back on the path we are meant to be on. Do not lower your standards for anything or anyone. Have a great weekend!